Ferret Owners Prayer

Because I'm only human, it's sometimes hard to be,

The wise, all-knowing creature, my Fuzzy expects of me.

And so I pray for help to somehow come to terms,

with the subtle implications, of what my fuzzbutt yearns.

When it‘s torn and tattered, please stop me seeing red,

I know the carpets are only there for them to shred.

I will let them dig right through the floor,

they know there‘s treasure behind that door.

Unless I keep my possessions under lock and key,

they will not stay where I want them to be.

Please stop me going mad, and becoming a grouch,

everybody knows that ferret‘s hide their stash under the couch.

I know it's really lots to ask, but please, oh please, hark,

I*lsquo;m only human, make me worthy of my Carpet Shark!!!

Adapted by Clive Slade